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Last night whilst fucking Kitten good and hard (we had to move to the floor because we were shaking the bed to bits and it was making quite a racket) she said ‘you can cum all over me if you like Daddy’ naturally I was thrilled to be so eagerly invited
CAN’T HAVE A BAD ENDING IF YOU NEVER GET AN ENDING.
True/False game. Make an assumption about me in my ask and I’ll tell you if its true or false. Go.
true-pain: I’m proud of us.
reblog if u hate capitalism but u still want to make money because you need money to survive capitalism lmao i'm sad
If every pork chop were perfect we wouldn’t have Lapis
Short version “If you’re kind only because God will reward you, then you’re not a really good person after all”.Thanks, True Detective.
dekatsu: muchymozzarella: stuckinthisgodforsakenhellhole: gaypussyretard: If some of you are curious Hodge is doing better! He had a GoFundMe which is already closed but here his his message to the output of support: Blaine here - Let me start
prokopetz:Don’t get the Jontron fandom too much credit just yet. Yeah, they’re turning it against him en masse, but if you pay attention to the actual substance of their criticisms, what they’re shocked about is that it turns out he “meant it”.
siriusblaque: narcissa malfoy was probably the most powerful occlumens in hogwarts history and nobody knew she literally stood up to lord voldemort and lied that harry potter was dead and i don’t know about you but if i were an evil ruler i would
madambitchtits:heavensairwaves:heavensairwaves:BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY CAME TO MY UNIVERSITY AND I FOUND HIM AND HE ASKED IF I WANTED A SELFIE WITH HIM AND NOW I HAVE A SELFIE WITH BILL NYE NO I DONT THINK YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND BILL NYE ASKED ME IF I
If you know me based on who I was a year ago, you don’t know me at all. My growth game is strong. Allow me to reintroduce myself.
If I were to meet Edward Elric I'd be all like "Who is this lovely tall man?" And then he would love me.
if you're reading this i already nutted
spookymoeghost: Cyberpunk: themes of postmodernism, the horrors of neoliberalism, the limits of consciousness. Steampunk: “what if I could wear an ugly hat”
elder-giry: Tbh go ahead and ship yourself with fictional characters, fuck people who try and police what’s “cringy”. If reading imagines and drawing self insert fanart makes you happy fucking go for it and don’t let anyone take that away from
kawaiite-mage:thelustiestargonianmaid:I wouldn’t need pronouns if bitches weren’t talking about me behind my back
agonicarts: If you reject me, I’ll disappear. in other news, the true route still destroys my soul.
vaergamor: If the only thing keeping a person decent is the expectation of divine reward then, brother, that person is a piece of shit. And I’d like to get as many of them out in the open as possible. You gotta get together and tell yourself stories
doctorandroseinatardis: lunaseemoony: buffyann23: berryban: rose-tyler-and-her-doctor: #Forever reblog this full-length shot #because she is on her tippy-toes and holding him by the lapels #and he’s balled his hands into fists#because if he
If anyone is going to True Colors Conference 2016 at Uconn:
Like this post if you’re going to True Colors Conference 2016
moonemoji: California facts: -we surf to school -if we don’t say “dude” at least 10 times a day we will die -same with “like” -we cry when it’s 60 degrees Fahrenheit bc it’s cold
sluttyoliveoil: *ends every piece of advice with “idk though” so that its not my fault if i ruin ur life*
If you have to ask if there is gluten in beer at eight in the morning, there is something wrong here.
If you can dream it, you can do it.
if tumblr never comes back i just want to say i fucking hate all of you.
leggings are pants and if you think leggings aren’t pants its probably because you are mad that you don’t look good in them
if i had a dollar for every time u annoyed me
can’t decide if i want to masturbate, eat a whole pizza, or kill myself
“money can’t buy happiness” is like the biggest lie ever do you know how happy i’d be if i was rich
Opinions are like orgasms. Mine’s more important and I dont care if you have one.
If I had a dollar for every time I see a bullshit story on tumblr
no one gives a fuck if that photo is queued and that you’re on vacation
WHAT DO BOYS EVEN FIND ATTRACTIVE ABOUT BOOBS THEY ARE LITERALLY BALLS OF FAT ON MY CHEST IF YOU CAN LOVE ME FOR THE FAT ON MY CHEST WHY CANT YOU LOVE ME FOR THE FAT ON MY STOMACH YOU PIECE OF SHIT
if I have to fight for your attention I probably won’t even want it anymore
If you ever don’t know what to get me for Christmas: Disney. MERCH.
if you’re a dude who likes fat girls you don’t deserve a medal or deserve to be praised or idolized for it. honestly
If you 16/17/18 and he 23/24/25He’s manipulating you.Trust. I can get behind this. They’re usually sociopaths too. Avoid. There’s a reason they’re not with someone their own age BOOST If youre 13/14/15 and hes 18/19/20 he does not care about
no female will take you seriously if you flirt with every girl
if all me and my partner did was watch netflix and eat pizza and grab each others butts i would be very unfulfilled and depressed
say it with me: love isnt always romanticthe closest person in the world to you doesnt have to be a romantic relationshipplatonic relationships are just as valid, if not morepeople being really close doesnt equate to romance
if i had a boyfriend who asked me to call him daddy no word of a lie i’d just pack my bags and leave silently in the night fuck that
if you killed yourself, imagine all the people who would pretend they ever gave a single flying fuck about you imagine all the useless fake shit they would say about how close they were to you and how upset they are that you’re gone when in reality
i fuckin hate that emoji face that’s laughing and crying at the same time, people will put it on literally anything like my friends were planning a picnic and someone was like ‘i’ll bring some crisps’ and used that face as if you would actually
venus-deathtrap: dream-fighter: norest4thaweary: Stretch marks don’t need to be sexualized in order to be accepted Fucking THANK YOU #yeah people only care about them if they on a perfect ass Legit.
dietmexicoke: Fact: if a tumblr story takes place on some form of public transportation and ends with a crowd cheering, 11 times out of 10 it is completely made up.
allforbeeb: If you consider yourself body positive, please support bodies even if they fall outside of your preferences
proteinpills:If you don’t believe in lightskint privilege, unfollow me. If you ever reference the Willie Lynch letter, unfollow me. If you feel like colorism applies to lightskint people, unfollow me. If you have a problem addressing your lightskint
kngshxt: the niggas that invented that sexual double standard shit is so corny. like can u imagine how lit it would be living in a world where instead of having to wonder if she flirting or just being nice, she would just come over and ask if u would
On one hand, I’m appalled that some poor woman had to fuck this flabby old man to make this be true. On the other hand, these were the pre-viagra days, so that this happened is no small feat.
redbloodedamerica: mallninjacode: pual1010: brownglucose: stunningpicture: So proud of my mother for doing her own research after I sent her that meme. A sign she hung in her car window. Stay woke Is this true? Not only is it true, it gets worse.
tarrnation31: If a friend was treating you bad or like shit you’d end that friendship in a heartbeat but if your significant other does we cant seem to break it off.
Wow. True Blood’s ending pisses me off so fucking much. I am not a fan of Sookie or Bill, but they belong together and they both deserved to be happy. He only wanted to die because he couldn’t give her life, but they could have adopted if
If I ever call you ‘a little shit’ it means I love you.
"If Adventure had a name...."
Yooooooo if you’re a girl who supports @thepureskin and believes (one man) over the (countless women) who have came out about him, unfollow me right the fuck now. I have no desire to interact with women who don’t support other women/believe
